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PostPosted: Fri Feb 29, 2008 7:56 pm 
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And when will you type out those fantasies of yours? We'd love to hear them! What type of man do you go for? Tall, young, hairy, strong, gentle, gentleman? C'mon, let's have it!
:happy0065: :happy0192:


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PostPosted: Thu Mar 13, 2008 7:50 pm 
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Women's sex fantasies are a lot about being swept away and made LOVE to (as opposed to getting fucked by) a man that has sex appeal, is strong and caring and makes you laugh. My perfect man only exists in my dreams and fantasies alas, no real world equivalent. Does that make me lonely? Not at all. Life and fantasy are two different things and I date real men, not fantasy ones. :)


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PostPosted: Mon Jul 13, 2009 3:24 pm 
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Bruno shoots, and scores

A gay audience is right to be wary, but it is heterosexual angst that's the real target of Sacha Baron Cohen's outrageous new creation

by Philip Hensher
Saturday 27 June 2009

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Sacha Baron Cohen as Bruno. Photograph: FAMOUS/FAMOUS

Here is a comedy sketch from the mid-1970s, between two characters.

Clarence: Ooh, hello Honky Tonks! You're in a bit of a hurry.

Policeman: I'm after a man, sir.

Clarence: Join the club.

Policeman: No, no, what I mean is, I'm chasing a fellow who's just robbed a bank.

Clarence: What's he look like?

Policeman: Big, dark, broad, well-muscled ...

Clarence: Oh, I say!

Policeman: Have you seen him, sir?

Clarence: No, but I've dreamt about him.

The Clarence character, played by Dick Emery, is dressed in a beige tartan tam o'shanter, with a tartan zip-front jumpsuit, and, interestingly, the same 14-holed DMs that half the patrons of the Vauxhall Tavern, the oldest gay bar in the south London gay village, were wearing when I was there last Sunday.

And here is another, from 2009. The scene is a gym.

Brüno: How would you protect yourself from being attacked by a homosexual?

Martial arts instructor: They probably would attack from behind.

Sacha Baron Cohen has made a very good career out of creating visual, filmic equivalents of William Donaldson's hoax correspondence, The Henry Root Letters. You present something absurd, offensive, or clearly insane to a public figure; their public obligations require them to answer as sensibly as they can, with comic results. The 11 O'Clock Show, an unlamented and otherwise completely unremarkable Channel 4 show, included a brief performance from Baron Cohen's character, the white "wigga" Ali G. Ali G interviewed various clueless public figures for, supposedly, a youth programme about politics, making a series of catastrophically embarrassing errors. The character was a great success, and was talked up into an independent programme, and, subsequently, a feature film. The film had its charms, but failed; it treated Ali G merely as a scripted character, rather than an unguided missile into the interview rooms of the famous.

A subsequent film, Borat, enlisted Baron Cohen's guerrilla tactics with great, though for many people, unwatchable success. A Kazakhstani journalist travels through America, gulling the unwary into making appalling statements - the high point, a group of drinkers in a saloon bar in the Midwest enthusiastically joining in with a chorus of "Throw the Jew down the well."

Now Brüno, in which a gay Austrian journalist meets with professional disaster and travels to America in search of celebrity. There is a little more plot than in Borat, but it features the same flaunted encounters with the genuine, bemused punter. These rely on the conviction that one person, at least, in each encounter is perfectly genuine, and has no idea what is going on.

After each of Baron Cohen's three characters had its major outing, the same question was raised. There is undoubtedly a "correct", politically inoffensive way to laugh at them. Are we, however, all laughing at the same thing? Does it matter if, far from subverting the structures of power, these films actually encourage people to laugh at, to hate even, the culturally vulnerable? For some time, there was considerable disagreement over whether Ali G was intended to be a black man, or a white youth with black affectations. Here, and in Borat, some people thought that audiences were being given licence to enjoy the clear statement of prejudices which, if the ordinary person stated them in the workplace, would probably lead to disciplinary action.

Watching a preview of Brüno with a large audience which had, I guess, vague connections to the media world - they couldn't possibly all have been critics - some of the same concerns couldn't be ignored. Why would a young and savvy London audience in 2009 find the sight of men having sex, or miming sex, so hilarious? What, really, did all of this say; not about gay people, like me, but about the people who will laugh and whoop and make gross-out noises at this film?

Brüno describes, with great care, what may be termed the "homosexual body", and describes what may be called envisaged homosexual sex. Neither of these, it seems to me, are intended to have anything at all to do with the bodies, or the real sexual habits, of homosexual men. They are delirious external fantasies. The homosexual body is a product of labour and expense. Brüno's extraordinary hair has not been seen on a gay man in western Europe since the heyday of the 1970s porn icon Peter Berlin. His voice is penetratingly high. He is plucked and shaved, with a pubic "landing strip"; his anus undergoes the indignity of being bleached. His sexual practices are evidence of physical prodigy: he has an anal cavity that can encompass a wine bottle, blunt end first. He possesses an entire secondary wardrobe for the bedroom, and engages in the practices set out, largely, by heterosexual urban myth - I was waiting for the hamster-up-the-arse gag, and it gets a loving recapitulation 10 minutes after the joke's first appearance.

As for Brüno's extraordinary fashion outfits, I must point out that I watched this film in Leicester Square; a walk of precisely six minutes to Soho's gay village would have enabled the audience to compare it with what urban, committed and, one must admit, wildly promiscuous homosexuals actually wear. It is not very much like that at all.

Clearly, the satirical target of Baron Cohen's film is not really homosexuality. It is heterosexuality or, to be more exact, the posturing and ludicrous assertions a heterosexuality which feels itself to be vulnerable makes. The heterosexuality under examination in the film seems so vulnerable that it actually resorts to recruiting from outside its natural constituency. One ugly heterosexual of the proselytising variety assures Brüno that, should he become heterosexual, he will have to put up with some things that everyone finds tiresome; he is talking about women, and his voice is uncommitted and doubtful.

The film finishes with a truly astonishing sequence at a wrestling match, which displays just how fragile contemporary American heterosexuality has become. A wrestler begins by whipping the crowd into cries of "Straight Race" and "My Asshole Is For Shitting" before his opponent enters the ring. Of course, the wrestler turns out to be Brüno; his opponent, his estranged and besotted assistant. Before long, the bout turns into a love-match, and the wrestlers begin to strip and embrace. The violence which erupts in the crowd is terrifying and hilarious in equal measure. There seems no good reason to doubt that, if they could, they would have killed these wrestlers, just as similar groups have killed gay men in middle America in recent years. It is a little like being asked to laugh at footage of a lynch mob, and, clearly, Baron Cohen is under no illusions about the mob mentality on display. The haunting, unforgettable, risible shot comes at the end; a man in the crowd in tears. What is he crying for? What has he seen? How is his sexuality threatened by the proximity of another? What has hurt him?

In a film, the effect is ultimately harmless. An audience is constantly being reassured that if the crowd is authentic, the actors are impersonating a sexuality they can walk away from. A key point in comedies of this sort is that we should be confident that the actor is heterosexual, and though Baron Cohen attended the London premiere in character with a supporting platoon of black musclemen, his real-life fiancee followed on behind, and was featured comfortingly in all the newspaper coverage. From Brokeback Mountain to Brüno, this impersonation of sexual preference gives all recent Hollywood treatments of gay characters a distinct Al Jolson air, and the rich tradition of gay actors playing gay characters seems, more or less, to have been abandoned. It would be interesting to know, had Baron Cohen been revealed to have had an affair with a man, what effect that would have on the success of this film.

In the climactic sequence, Universal, moreover, has protected its expensive talent with a cage, and no real danger is ever envisaged. In real life, crowds are offered more licence for their mass behaviour; their targets cannot renounce their sexuality like a role. Groups, and individuals influenced by group psychology, have murdered in Britain and the United States. Matthew Shepard was murdered by two men acting in collusion in 1998 in Wyoming. Jody Dobrowski was killed by two men on a planned spree on Clapham Common in south London in 2005. David Morley was murdered on the South Bank in London in 2004 by a teenage gang, who filmed the attack. Reading through the horrible accounts of these murders, one thing which recurs is the savagery of each attack, as if not murder but obliteration were the aim of the perpetrators. Dobrowski could only be identified by his fingerprints. Something beyond mere rage seems to have been awoken here.

Open and frank hatred of homosexuals through comedy has been remarkably persistent, and may even be on the increase in the media. The Radio 1 DJ Chris Moyles casually uses the word "gay" in a derogatory way and ridicules the gay singer Will Young for his sexuality; he was defended by the BBC for the first incident, but censured for the second. Jimmy Carr has discovered that the use of the words "gay benders" is enough to raise a laugh from a Channel 4 audience. Al Murray caused immense offence with a character in a sketch show who was both gay and a Nazi - that was the joke. He seemed to have forgotten that many thousands of gay men were murdered by the Third Reich. Those who survived the war were not, unlike all other categories of the persecuted, eligible for compensation. Still funny?

The appalling Horne and Corden show got a laugh out of a sketch about a gay war reporter - I suppose the joke was that gay men shouldn't be interested in foreign or military affairs. A presenter of a talent show broadcast for a family audience, Patrick Kielty, mocked a male contestant who seemed moved almost to tears by calling him "a big gayer"; the BBC defended this stereotypical comment by saying that it was "not intended to cause offence".

What relationship there is between publicly funded, broadcast abuse and violence against homosexuals is debatable. Probably the media have done no more than reflect some vulgar usage, and propagate it more widely. Probably there is a feeling among the commissioners of television comedy and its perpetrators that we all know that racial minorities, sexual minorities, old people, the disabled, and women deserve equal respect. Since we all know that, why not exercise a little bit of ridicule? Little Britain and The League of Gentlemen, which joyously set about mocking all of these supposed minorities, opened the way for a lot of the less good-humoured abuse on comedy shows and panel games.

Feeling is running high among gay people, it is fair to say, about the double standards which mean that homophobic comments are not routinely removed from broadcasters' online message boards in the way that racist comments are; that Kielty calling someone "a big gayer" is regarded as obviously much less offensive than a white girl on Big Brother calling a fellow contestant a "nigger".

My observation is that gay people, usually rather partial to a bit of high camp humour, think that something has changed between the first series of Little Britain and a consistently homophobic show like 8 Out of 10 Cats. The assumption among gay people, too, is that comedy on a gay theme, produced by a straight comedian, will be about as funny as a Chris Moyles routine.

It is worth noting that I asked half a dozen gay friends if they would like to come and see the preview of Brüno; all refused. I think they were wrong, and if they go and see it, they will understand that Baron Cohen is not a bigot but, self-evidently, a remarkably brave man; that his satirical subject is the absurd posturing of a heterosexuality in terrible crisis. This is a very different matter from the hatred and abuse you hear on television every Friday night.

And yet there is the audience. Towards the end of the film, Brüno tries to marry his faithful assistant, Lutz, who turns up in a wedding dress. The audience laughed as if they had never seen anything so funny in their lives. As it happens, I married a man last month. Neither of us wore a wedding dress; we were surrounded by our families and friends and we danced until the small hours. It is sad to think that the sort of people who laugh at two men getting married in a film might also want to laugh at two men getting married in real life, or even at two men in love with each other. There is no obligation on Baron Cohen's part to show the reality, or to display sympathy. That is not his job. I feel it ought to be someone's job, somewhere, and perhaps soon.

A brief history of camp comedy

Julian and Sandy The two chorus boys from BBC radio's Round the Horne, played by Hugh Paddick and Kenneth Williams with virtuoso innuendo and an impenetrable way with polari, the postwar gay slang. "We've got a criminal practice that takes up most of our time." Bona!

Mr Humphries "Mr Rumbold's been taken queer." "Anything I can do?" The nation's favourite sodomite, in Are You Being Served from 1972 to 1985. Inexplicably, John Inman, left, the actor behind Mr Humphries, always denied Mr Humphries was gay at all. So what was the point?

Clarence Dick Emery, the 1960s and 1970s forerunner of Harry Enfield, created a deathless classic in Clarence, the man-crazed but always cheerful gay. "Hello Honky Tonks!" was his catchphrase, surely well overdue a revival.

Rob and Michael In 1979, an amazing thing happened. In the ITV sitcom Agony, a pair of gay characters had major roles. No innuendo, no jokes involving cucumbers, not a scrap of diamante or sequin. They looked like real people, weren't defined by their sex lives, and could actually be quite funny. It would never catch on, though.

Ted and Ralph The Fast Show was surely at its finest, funniest and most enchanting in the long-running story of the fixated squire Ralph, and the unlikely object of his passion, the monosyllabically guarded handyman Ted.

Dafydd The Only Gay in the Village was one of the most popular characters from the start of Little Britain. Written and performed by a gay actor, Matt Lucas, Dafydd was a clever addition to the repertoire of gay stereotypes for once, not a repetition of an old-hat one.

Source: Guardian UK.

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PostPosted: Mon Dec 28, 2009 7:16 pm 
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Young Swedish women more likely to have sex with each other: study

23 December 2009
Online: http://www.thelocal.se/24026/20091223/

Young Swedes have ever more fluid definitions of sex and sexuality, according to a new study from Malmö University in southern Sweden. Women in particular are more likely to pursue sexual activities with others of the same gender.

"We are seeing a greater openness among young people, particularly among young women. There is an increasing interest in experimenting and pushing boundaries, and a growing resistance to defining oneself as heterosexual, homosexual or bisexual," Sven-Axel Månsson, a Malmö University sociology professor, told Dagens Nyheter (DN) newspaper.

MÃ¥nsson and colleague Kristian Daneback surveyed 855 young people between the ages of 18 and 24 via an online questionnaire. The survey showed that 31 percent of young women and 7 percent of young men said that they were most often sexually attracted to people of the opposite sex, but sometimes they were attracted to people of their own gender.

Thirty-nine percent of the women and 8 percent of the men reported having sexual fantasies about both genders. Young women were also far more likely than their male counterparts to act on their same-sex fantasies, with 13 percent of female respondents and 3 percent of male respondents reporting that they have had sex with both men and women.

"Girls are less bound by norms than guys are; it is not as taboo for them to have sex with (other women)," MÃ¥nsson told DN. He added that the figures for women having sex with other women were "strikingly high".

"Many no longer wish to be tied in to rigid sexual identities, they want to be open and free as people and as sexual beings. That is my interpretation," said MÃ¥nsson.

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PostPosted: Tue May 04, 2010 3:53 pm 
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FLARICO - NEW SUPPORTERS AND MEDICAL JOCKS!

Although we've been carrying the Flarico hard cup supporters for a while, we now carry five new Flarico products including the classic F110 supporter. Why classic? Well go way back in history to the late 1890s, a few years after Bike came out with their famous #10, a manufacturing plant called John B. Flaherty Co. started making the F110 athletic supporter for the military. Twenty years ago, the same family purchased Martin Inc. Mfg and merged the two companies. John B. Flaherty is Flarico / Martin Inc's current owner's great great grandfather and that company is still producing the original F110 today - that, in my books makes it a classic!

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PostPosted: Wed Jan 19, 2011 3:35 pm 
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Straight men kissing more

Why are more and more straight men locking lips in public — and does it mean the end of homophobia?

by Lucy Tobin
Tuesday 4 January 2011

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"Sexual minorities have made tremendous cultural and legal improvements towards equality", says Eric Anderson, of Bath University. Photograph: Pascal Le Segretain/Corbis

When two students asked Eric Anderson, a sociology lecturer at Bath University's department of education, if he had heard of the game "gay chicken", he shook his head. "I had no clue what it was," he says. "So they showed me." The students — both men — went in to kiss each other.

"The challenge was that whoever pulled out first was the loser," Anderson explains. "But because men are no longer afraid of this, they ended up kissing." Anderson was inspired to carry out a new research project. Growing up in the US, Anderson did his PhD on "the intersection of sport, masculinities and declining homophobia" after coming out at 25.

His research subjects caught the interest of students at Bath, hence the question about "gay chicken". Anderson discovered that the game had almost died out in the UK in the last few years "because nobody ever loses", and began to consider heterosexual university students' views of kissing other men. "I started going through my students' Facebook profiles, with their permission, and was inundated with hundreds of photos of men kissing on their nights out," Anderson reports.

He was intrigued, and decided to investigate further via formal research. He interviewed 145 students, a mixture of men studying sports-related subjects and every third man who left the library on a particular day, from two different universities, plus other male students from a sixth-form college. The results of his survey showed 89% of the polled men saying they were happy to kiss another man on the lips through friendship. And almost 40% added that they had engaged in "sustained kissing, initially for shock value, but now just for 'a laugh'."

"I started telling people about it, but found that a lot of academics literally did not believe me," Anderson explains. "One professor excused it as 'something in the water at Bath' — even though the research covered three different educational establishments. Others flatly told me that they did not believe me. From their 'adult' perspective, this action was unfathomable. They have been stamped with attitudes of acceptable behaviour as a part of their entry into adulthood, and kissing was not permitted between men when they were young. So although they had not been in students' clubs or pubs in 20 or more years, they assumed that nothing had changed. This is known as human plasticity theory; people are stamped with a belief system that they cannot easily shake."

In contrast, Anderson, 43, now believes homophobia is dying out on university campuses, and says attitudes to male kissing reflect that. "Sexual minorities have made tremendous cultural and legal improvements towards equality — the media is saturated with images of sexual minorities, and homosexuality is almost normalised today," he says. "This is particularly true of youth. Young people have disassociated themselves from homophobia the way they once did from racism.



"This is not to say that all youth are gay-friendly, but there's an awareness that anybody can be gay without the homohysteria — where men try to act in sexist, hyper-macho and homophobic ways to prove they are not gay — that used to exist. Young men are becoming softer and more inclusive."

Anderson says men are now kissing each other to show their "intimacy towards one another", but not in a homosexual way. "The kisses seem to be stripped of sexual connotation, and given the percentage of men doing them, they certainly do not indicate a hidden homosexual desire." The trend, he adds, is not just in a few UK universities or even limited to Britain. "I've interviewed graduate students who did their bachelor degrees at other universities, and been to undergraduate clubs and pubs from Bristol to Birmingham to Edinburgh — I can definitively say that although the percentages might vary depending on the city, the class and the racial background, these kissing behaviours are happening all over the country. I have also found it occurring in a fifth of the 60 university soccer players I interviewed in the US, and have a friend who is beginning formal research into male kissing in Australia after recording it there."

The soaring popularity of male kissing is, Anderson believes, partly thanks to the behaviour of professional sportsmen, especially top football players. "That has been mimicked by footballers at lower levels — a kiss in a moment of sporting glory. When these men brought it into the pubs, their kisses made it OK for other men to do the same. The knock-on effect is that gay men can now kiss in student spaces as well." He believes that his findings indicate that the UK is "near the end of homophobia being acceptable for youth in the UK".

He explains: "You would be gravely mistaken to think that most youth are homophobic. Kids are coming out earlier and earlier — contact theory works: we all have gay friends and family members today. Homophobia is in rapid retreat — it's just not the issue it was when I was a kid."

He expects "many academics and executives will shake their heads at that statement". "When I say that homophobia is in retreat, people often point to one case and think every gay person is oppressed," he says. "One academic said to me last year, 'what about Matthew Sheppard?' [a gay American student who was beaten to death in 2001]. I replied, that was 6,000 miles away, and 11 years ago. We're very good at holding one case of bullying up as a belief that this is the common experience, but the common experience for gay kids is that they are treated just fine."

Anderson is now moving his research on to cuddling. "Last week, I was talking to my second-year students about two straight men cuddling; they laughed, 'what's the big deal about that'," he says. "I polled them, and found that 14/15 said they had spooned another man, in bed, sleeping all night long. Gone are the days in which men would rather sleep on the floor or head to toe; not only do they share beds and cuddle, but they are not homosexualised for this."

Source: Guardian UK.

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PostPosted: Sat Apr 09, 2011 4:50 pm 
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'Our Society is Still Ignorant about Sex'
11 March 2011
By Thomas Hüetlin and Claudia Voigt

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Model Uschi Obermaier, a free-love icon of the 1960s, poses topless in 1970.
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German sexologist Volkmar Sigusch was one of the main thinkers behind the sexual revolution of the 1960s. In a SPIEGEL interview, he discusses its legacy, the benefits of online porn, why open marriages can sometimes be a good option and why it's important to keep things dirty in the bedroom.

SPIEGEL: Professor Sigusch, you headed the Institute for Sexual Science in Frankfurt for 33 years while working as a therapist. Do people ever tell the truth about sex?

Volkmar Sigusch: When it comes to sexuality, people like to tell lies. It's only when it comes to money that they lie more.

SPIEGEL: You are viewed as having been one of the main theorists behind the sexual revolution of the late 1960s. How profoundly did our sex lives change at the time?

Sigusch: I will always be referred to as a theorist, but I was only a fellow traveller with a degree. The sexual revolution produced cultural convulsions that were unparalleled in the 20th century. The female sex was historically sexualized and required to have orgasms for the first time. Sexual "deviants," particularly homosexuals, achieved partial emancipation.

SPIEGEL: Free love produces free people and a free society -- that was the idea, at least. But it didn't work.

Sigusch: At the time, the idea that the entire, despised society would come crashing down if things became liberated sexually seemed to make sense. But, in truth, a "King Sex" was set up. And the things that could be derived from the sexual sphere -- happiness, endless fun and the end of capitalism -- were grossly overestimated. The symbolic overglorification was downright unbearable.

SPIEGEL: But weren't you, as a sexual scientist, also fighting against the uptightness of the 1950s and '60s?

Sigusch: That's true. But I had little in common with those who parroted someone like (Freud student, psychoanalyst and sex theorist) Wilhelm Reich. The sexual revolution of the 1960s was mostly a movement of young people. I felt that the so-called "free relationships" were overrated.

SPIEGEL: How do you explain the fact that, despite the radical changes, most people still subscribe to the ideal of a solid, monogamous relationship?

Sigusch: Because it's the most compatible with our spiritual origins. Father, mother, small family -- that's the way we've developed our souls, the way we've become, and the way we feel safe, protected and loved.

SPIEGEL: Even so, problems usually spring up in many relationships.

Sigusch: Sexual desire declines after four to seven years. That's been proven.

SPIEGEL: German writer Gottfried Benn once wrote that marriage is an institution that cripples the sex drive.

Sigusch: There are many options in a marriage. If the couple has been together for a certain amount of time and has a certain amount of liberalism or life experience, it could be the kind of relationship in which one partner ventures into the occasional affair, which is then forgiven. This only happens every 13 years on average, but it obviously does occur.

SPIEGEL: That rarely? Perhaps there's a discrepancy in this case between the truth and scientific findings.

Sigusch: Some 95 percent of all sexual contact still occurs in permanent relationships. That's an impressive number. Nevertheless, lack of sexual desire is naturally an issue. With an intelligent couple, it ought to be possible for the husband or wife to look for satisfaction outside the relationship -- while always taking the partner into consideration, meaning acting openly but still discreetly. Perhaps the couple got married at 25 and now they're 45 and this is an option. And if a couple is still together, or perhaps finds its way back together, I like to say that it's forever. They belong together, it's a good fit, it's the right pairing. It almost gives me goose bumps.

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When it comes to the future of sexuality, veteran German sexologist Volkmar Sigusch believes there will be other options in addition to traditional marriages.

SPIEGEL: But hasn't the idea of the open relationship failed because it's so hard to deal with the consequences?

Sigusch: You've described that correctly. The social problem is that we haven't come up with any alternative models. Our culture hasn't developed an ars erotica. Think, for example, of conditions in India or in Japanese culture and of how the erotic has been cultivated there. They're not as clinical and rabbit-like as we are.

SPIEGEL: That's a cliché.

Sigusch: No, it isn't. In and out and done -- it's still that way today. End of story. It's a tragedy.

SPIEGEL: Are you saying that our society has been talking about sex for 40 years but nothing has really changed?

Sigusch: I maintain that we are still a largely ignorant society when it comes to sex. We speak incorrectly and superficially about sexuality. And when you talk about it too much, you run the risk of destroying its mystery.

SPIEGEL: So, on the one hand, couples don't talk enough and don't know enough about their desires and, on the other hand, they talk too much?

Sigusch: You've got me there. It's important for a couple to talk about their sexual preferences. On the other hand, the aura of the mysterious should be preserved.

SPIEGEL: What exactly is this "aura of the mysterious"?

Sigusch: A minor perversion that a couple shares, for example. A fetish that one of the two partners finds arousing, or a particular sexual scenario. I'm reminded of a female patient who was particularly aroused by the shape of her husband's shoulder. And this hint of perversion should ideally remain a secret for both partners. I'm talking about a spiritual concentration in the unconscious. Fantasies have to remain dirty. Cleanliness, scrupulousness and rationality are poison for eroticism.

SPIEGEL: How do websites like YouPorn, which is viewed by millions, change sexuality?

Sigusch: It's part of the neo-sexual revolution that began in the late 1970s and continues to this day. A key feature of this revolution is the large-scale publication and commercialization of details that were once secret. Sexuality has been trivialized. The interesting thing about this is that exaggerated portrayals apparently destroy desire more effectively than any repression.

SPIEGEL: Can YouPorn help reduce feelings of sexual guilt?

Sigusch: Only superficially. But for people who are desperate and searching, sexuality on the Internet offers an incredible release. In the past, every pervert believed that he was the only one who had an abstruse desire. Today, he can find out on the Internet that there's someone like him in New Zealand or Patagonia. On the other hand, Internet sexuality shows that we're becoming more and more self-involved. I'm talking about self-sex.

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A stripper at an erotic trade show in Berlin: Sigusch believes that Western society has not developed an "ars erotica" like India or Japan. Instead, he sees Western sexuality as "clinical and rabbit-like," adding: "In and out and done -- it's still that way today. End of story. It's a tragedy."

Part 2: 'I have the Utmost Respect for Asexuals'

SPIEGEL: How does it affect the sexual development of adolescents when they can experience sex on the Internet before having it themselves?

Sigusch: While the Internet generally tends to have a stress-relieving function for adults -- as long as they aren't inclined toward sex addiction -- I don't see this being the case for adolescents. Most pornographic images are simply too repulsive. Besides, secrets are destroyed that are central to the experience of love. But most young people seem to be behaving very intelligently: They look at things once in a while, but then they find it so idiotic and uncool that they just look away again. That is, provided they're not growing up in a family in which a drunk father is already watching pornos in the morning.

SPIEGEL: What will sexuality look like in the future?

Sigusch: There will be other forms in addition to our classic marriage. One is already looming on the horizon: polyamory, or having more than one intimate partner. In other words, you're married to a woman who has no objection to another woman joining the couple. Then she brings in her boyfriend. Suddenly you realize -- my God! -- you can love more than one person. In fact, you can love several people at the same time.

SPIEGEL: Isn't that exhausting?

Sigusch: No one has to choose this option; it's just one of many possibilities. We will experience a broader spectrum of socially accepted forms of sexual life. Incidentally, I have the utmost respect for people who are asexual. I didn't believe that they existed at first. But they do exist, and their numbers are growing.

SPIEGEL: Asexuality contradicts the modern promise of happiness, which holds that a fulfilled and exciting sexuality is part of a successful life.

Sigusch: This promise of happiness can also be a fatal burden, so that sexuality is pushed back more and more and people try to replace what they've lost with other forms of excitement. There are young men who want thrills but no longer value sex, so they do completely different things, including aggressive things.

SPIEGEL: What do you see as the biggest taboo in sexuality today?

Sigusch: Clearly child sexuality, including everything that goes with it -- pedophilia, pedosexuality.

SPIEGEL: Can these forms of sexuality be treated with therapy?

Sigusch: It's very important to approach pedophiles and pedosexuals and offer them therapy. It's been my experience that you can reach your objective with what I would call kind-hearted, informed and enlightened patients -- in the sense that they don't lose their desire, but that they no longer have physical contact with children. That would be the goal.

SPIEGEL: It sounds like you believe there's a group of perpetrators or pedophiles that aren't reachable through therapy.

Sigusch: Yes, there is. That's been my experience. They can't be reached with offers of therapy. There are pedosexuals who, even if the court forces them to go into treatment, do not pursue it or cannot pursue it. There have also been cases in which I was completely deceived as a therapist and in which the police would suddenly discover recent photographs of children while conducting a search.

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According to the sexologist, pornographic websites like YouPorn are "part of the neo-sexual revolution, which began in the late 1970s and continues to this day.

SPIEGEL: How should society treat these people?

Sigusch: In accordance with the law. There is no other way to answer the question. We are all potential murderers, and we are all potential rapists and abusers.

SPIEGEL: More than four years ago, when you retired, the Frankfurt-based Institute for Sexual Science was closed. Since then, you've been fighting a rather unpromising fight to at least preserve a professorship of sexual medicine and your outpatient center.

Sigusch: I think it's downright intolerable. Over the decades we -- and here I'm also referring to (German sexologists) Martin Dannecker and Reimut Reiche -- have studied such diverse topics as youth sexuality, homosexuality, gender tension and transsexuality. We established sexual science between medicine and sociology. Society still needs this crazy discipline. The traits of our sexual culture are still speechlessness, loneliness, violence and not enough desire and love.

SPIEGEL: As a therapist, are you ever surprised by anything anymore?

Sigusch: Yes, again and again, and it makes me very happy. Take, for example, the so-called "objectophiles," who fall in love with and desire inanimate objects, like a machine or an instrument. Just ask a hundred men with whom they spend more time and who they love more: their wife or their new car? Just go to an auto show, and you'll see all the signs of sexual arousal in the men: shiny eyes, tremors, sex flush. An acute example of the need for professional sex research.

SPIEGEL: How exactly do you define good sex?

Sigusch: That's where I agree with Woody Allen: Good sex can be anything, including dirty.

SPIEGEL: Professor Sigusch, thank you for this interview.

Source: Spiegel.

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PostPosted: Wed Jul 20, 2011 2:11 pm 
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Why are we afraid of male sexuality?

We may have gone a long way towards liberating women, but male desire is increasingly seen as a problem

by Ally Fogg
Monday 18 July 2011

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While older women are now widely eroticised, male equivalents such as John Major are attacked as 'old lechers'. Photograph: Martin Godwin for the Guardian

Is there anything good to be said about male sexuality? That might seem a daft question. Apparently it brings a lot of pleasure and excitement to the lives of men and women alike, it's inspired some of the greatest art, music and literature through the ages and has played a fairly substantial role in sustaining our species and populating the planet. Nonetheless you'll need to search very, very hard to find any positive appraisal of male heterosexuality.

Since the era of the permissive society and the mainstreaming of modern feminism, western society has gone a long way towards liberating women's sexuality. Younger women have, to an unprecedented extent, been encouraged to believe they can be as sexual as they like and to experience and express their desires as they wish. Even the age-old proscriptions on female promiscuity have been largely broken down, exemplified by the glorious flowering of the SlutWalk movement.

Simultaneously, and perhaps not coincidentally, male sexuality has been increasingly seen as a problem. You can hear it in the gentle, dismissive mockery that says men are simple creatures who "only want one thing" or, at the extreme, outright vilification. The male gaze threatens, male desire is aggressive. Our primal instincts are pathologised with the jargon of gender studies. Righteous and necessary efforts to reduce sexual crimes have had the unwelcome effect of teaching generations of men that our sexuality can be dangerous and frightening.

Don't believe me? Look back at the Bailey review into the early sexualisation of children, and the surrounding media hoo-ha. Leaving aside any concerns about the veracity and accuracy of the report itself (and I have plenty myself) it is striking that acres of print were devoted to the impacts of these social trends on girls, their self-esteem and body image; their developing sexuality; their safety and security. Barely a word was spoken about boys, beyond fears that they are being turned into beasts.

Again and again the message came out: girls have problems. Boys are problems. And yet does anyone doubt that there should be concerns about how easy access to porn impacts upon boys' sexual development, their self-esteem, their body image or performance anxieties? It's not as if young men bask in perfect mental health and happiness — young men commit suicide at nearly four times the rate of young women, and sex and relationships rank high on their list of concerns.

At the other end of the age range, sexually active older women are now widely eroticised (albeit often with a rather misogynistic undertone) as "cougars" or (forgive me) "Milfs" while their male equivalents are disparaged as dirty old men. Observer columnist Viv Groskop recently went further, opining about any older man who has sex outside marriage, even the mild-mannered old janitor John Major, saying "Unfortunately it's not against the law to be an old lecher. Maybe it should be. Or at the very least you shouldn't be rewarded with the highest office in the land."

Perhaps the greatest concern for men and women alike should be the way male sexuality and sexual expressiveness balances on a narrow tightrope of acceptability. One step off the wire and you tumble into the realm of perversion. As feminist blogger Clarisse Thorn noted last year, any man who hits on a woman and gets it wrong risks being branded a "creep" — sometimes deservedly so, of course, but often for no greater sin than being insufficiently attractive or socially skilled, or having misread a perceived signal of invitation. I've never heard of a woman being stigmatised or disparaged for expressing an attraction to big men, rough men, geeky men or whatever. A man who expresses similar desires for women who don't conform to standard norms of beauty is a perv, a fetishist, a weirdo.

All of these prejudices are rehearsed and reiterated by men and women alike, they reside in the intangible web of social norms, conventions and culture, but they can and must be challenged and changed. If we can begin to openly and joyously celebrate the positives to male sexuality, it might become easier for men to be happy and confident sexual partners, and in turn become better lovers, and sometimes better people.

Male sexuality is no less diverse, complex and wonderful than women's or, for that matter, no more base, coarse and animalistic. Sure, most men might be slightly more likely to let our gaze linger on eye-catching curves, and slightly less likely to giggle about our lovers' proclivities with our friends, but in the grand picture women and men are surprisingly similar, in this respect as in so many others. Women have been entirely justified in asking that we blokes respect their rights, autonomy and wishes, that we respect them as sexual beings. It shouldn't be too much to ask for a little of the same in return.

Source: Guardian UK.

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PostPosted: Fri Aug 26, 2011 6:25 pm 
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Slutwalk comes to Germany
14 August 2011

Thousands of women in bikinis, mini-skirts and fishnet tights took to the streets of cities across Germany on Saturday as part of global protests against the idea that a woman's clothing should be a factor in whether she 'deserves' to be sexually attacked.

At least 1,500 people, including plenty of men, participated in the Berlin Slutwalk, while several hundred marched in Frankfurt, Munich, Dortmund, Cologne and Hamburg.

Dressed in revealing outfits, or in some cases only gaffer tape, the German protesters carried banners and chanted slogans such as "A dress is not a yes," "My body to give not yours to take," "I have nothing to wear that protects me against violence," as they walked through the city.

The Slutwalk campaign was sparked by Constable Michael Sanguinetti of the Toronto police force, who said at a crime prevention forum in January, "Women should avoid dressing like sluts in order not to be victimized." In response, over 3,000 people marched in Toronto in April, since when Slutwalks have been held in cities across the world, including London, Sydney and Mexico City. The original founders of the movement wrote in a statement that women "are tired of being oppressed by slut-shaming; of being judged by our sexuality and feeling unsafe as a result." Sanguinetti later apologized for his remarks.

Co-organizer of the Hamburg walk Anna Rinne explained the reason for the protests. "Even when people walk half-naked through the streets, it is not their fault if they are victims of violence," she told the DPA news agency.

Source: The Local.

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PostPosted: Wed Mar 28, 2012 2:03 pm 
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Pernickety Dicky | Metrosexual Copenhagen
by Richard Steed
February 26, 2012

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English by nature – Danish at heart. Freelance journalist Richard Steed has lived in Copenhagen for nearly five years now. “I love this city and want Copenhagen to be a shining example to the rest of the world.”

Back in the 1980s, when I was a young man, I somehow had a good ‘gaydar’ and was able to spot whether a man was gay or not.

Many who later became my friends had, as my dad said, “a touch of lavender about them”. Somehow they were different, whether it was due to their flawless skin (from using a face moisturiser) or naturally better fashion style, or just too much hairspray. Or the fact that the ‘80s were all about big hair, big shoulder pads and lots of glamour, and homosexuals didn’t look as ridiculous as the straights. My point is, I generally found them easier to spot and so would always gravitate towards them, knowing that at least I would have a fun night out.

Move forward 25 years and, you know what, today I cannot really tell anymore who is gay or not! Last weekend out in Copenhagen, my ‘gaydar’ was malfunctioning as I looked around the busy bar I was in. The straight men chatting up the chicks looked like the new gay boys to me. With their pumped up tattooed bodies, fake tans, flawless skin, perfect hair, plucked eyebrows and highly conscious fashion style, they looked gayer than my gay friends.

It’s what I have been told is the metrosexual look that is currently sweeping this city. Today it’s the straight boys who are copying the gay boys and embracing the ever-growing market of male grooming.

image

The term metrosexual was first coined in 1994 and describes a man who spends a lot of money and time on his appearance. Six main tips have been identified for how to spot them:

1. They own 20 pairs of shoes, half a dozen pairs of sunglasses, just as many watches and often carry a man-purse.
2. They see a stylist instead of a barber, because barbers don’t do highlights.
3. They only wear Calvin Klein or Björn Borg briefs, which can be seen at all times.
4. They shave more than just their faces. They also exfoliate and moisturise.
5. They cannot imagine a day without their hair styling products.
6. They can’t stop admiring themselves in the mirror at the local gym while they pump iron.

So today it’s okay for a man to be vain, whatever your sexual persuasion, and now Copenhagen is awash with metrosexuals who look gay, even act a bit gay, but clearly are not. I wonder if they see their own irony?

Meanwhile, it looks like the homosexuals have quit the vanity battle and have gone to live a heterosexualised quiet, normal and suburban life with Villa, Volvo and Wuffy. Today they are the ones with little style and can often be spotted in unflattering jogging pants and tasteless casual sweaters at the local garden centre.

So it’s a crazy world right now with heterosexual men looking like the new gay boys, and gay men acting like the old bad-styled straights. It makes you wonder what’s next for male sexuality in the 21st century? Maybe the next big thing to come from all this male vanity and sexual identity crossover is the rise of the bisexual.

My view is: bring it on!

Source: Copenhagen Post.

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PostPosted: Fri Dec 14, 2012 8:03 pm 
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Dude or dude-bro: ten ways to tell
by Jill Filipovic
Wednesday 14 November 2012

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The definitive dude-bro band: Nickelback singer Chad Kroeger performs in Abu Dhabi, 3 November 2012. Photograph: Jumana El Heloueh/Reuters

The short answer is that the dude-bro is a sexist, homophobic douche. But bro, get this: it's not that hard just to be a dude

As a straight single woman in my twenties, I love me some dudes. But I can't stand the dude-bros. And I weep at the fact that dude-bro culture seems to be quickly taking over dude culture.

What is a dude-bro, and how is he different from a standard dude?

Answers vary, but the dude-bro seems fairly synonymous with the douche (an insult I remain strongly in favor of). He's Guy Fieri. He's the Abercrombie-wearing frat boy pumping his fist and screaming "USA! USA!" at the concert you're attending. He's walking through the Burger King drive-in drunk at 3am and calling the cashier a fag. He's probably wearing some variety of khaki short and maybe a baseball hat. He's probably white, probably fairly affluent, probably was in a fraternity and definitely refers to his male friends as his "bros."

Dude-bros, of course, are not the same in every pocket of the United States, but they always adapt to the local culture, creating insular groups of men who use cultural cues like clothing and speech patterns to display their dude-bro-ness, and who militantly share the same tastes and preferences (some variation on the theme of mediocre bands, mediocre restaurants and sorority girls). In New York, he's a finance douche. In Orange County, he drives a ridiculous car. In North Carolina, he's cheering for Duke.

So why all the hate? Can't I just let bros be bros?

No. Bros are a scourge on American culture, and their intense conformity is disturbing in itself. But they're also displaying a toxic brand of masculinity that's harmful to both men and women. Dude-bro culture centers on a conventional masculinity that doesn't leave room for much individuality, let alone serious deviation from heterosexual male norms. And the heterosexual norms that dude-bros embrace are largely about exercising dominance over women. Their version of sex is something men get from women, even if they have to coerce or force it.

And men who aren't sexually predatory and hyper-conformist to frat-boy standards? Fags, obviously.

Luckily, most dudes aren't dude-bros, and male culture in the US is shifting to allow a diversity of male experience and expression. Male friendships are increasingly highlighted in popular media, and intense, emotionally complex friendships between men are increasingly acceptable.

So how do you know if you're a regular dude or a dude-bro? Here are a few questions to help you along:

1). Are your male friends dudes who you actually talk to about stuff other than sports and whatever woman you've most recently banged?

2). Do you find women genuinely interesting human beings who you enjoy knowing as people, or do you think they're really advanced blow-up dolls whose main benefits (vaginas, boobs) are often out-shadowed by serious downsides (opinions, nagging)?

3). Do you use phrases like "that's so gay" to deride something you don't like? Do you regularly call other men "fags" when they do something you think is stupid?

4). If someone gets testy when you use words like fag, do you defend yourself with someone version of, "But I have a friend who's gay!"?

5). Did you vote for Mitt Romney?

6). If you didn't vote for Mitt Romney, is it because politics is just, like so gay?

7). Is targeting a really drunk girl the best way to get laid? Do you think girls get wasted so that their inhibitions will be lowered and they'll do you?

8 ). Do you know what negging is? Is it a tactic you've employed in your dating life?

9). Do you think Judd Apatow is a comic genius? Did you think the same thing about Pauley Shore ten years ago?

10). Am I a fat, ugly, man-hating dyke bitch for writing this article?

If you actually need me to tell you what answers point toward "you're a dude-bro," I'm sorry bro, but you may be guilty as charged. But all hope is not lost! Most of us make mistakes in our youth (true story: I was a Christian virginity pledger, purity ring and all). To the dude-bros who don't want to be rapey, homophobic creeps: there's plenty you can do to have male friends, like sports, have a good time, be whatever kind of man you want to be and still not be a jerk.

First, push back against misogyny and homophobia in your social circle. Yeah, "fag" and "bitch" are just words, but they're words with a lot of punch – they're words that lots of fags and bitches hear thrown at them when we're being physically assaulted, actually. Don't tolerate them.

Second, fight against toxic sexual culture. Obviously, don't coerce women into sex, but also don't tolerate social norms that make it acceptable to coerce women into sex. Help to build a masculinity that understands women have sexual desire, too, and that says it's profoundly pathetic to have to basically trick or talk someone into sleeping with you.

Third, battle gender conformity. Dress, talk and socialize however you want, but recognize that there are myriad ways to be a man, and what kind of pants (or skirt or make-up) you wear has exactly zero to do with maleness or strength or character. Don't undermine the masculinity of men who display it differently than you do. Let dudes just be dudes.

If you would stop propping up the careers of bands like Nickelback, that would be great, too.

Source: Guardian UK.

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PostPosted: Thu Jan 03, 2013 3:34 pm 
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Parents struggle to find gender-neutral toys
21 December 2012
By MICHELLE R. SMITH

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In this Thursday, Dec. 6, 2012 photo, McKenna Pope,13, poses for The Associated Press in her home in Garfield, N.J. Hasbro has announced it has been developing an Easy-Bake Oven in the gender-neutral colors of black and silver. (AP Photo/Julio Cortez)

PROVIDENCE, R.I. (AP) -- A 13-year-old girl's campaign to get Hasbro to make an Easy-Bake Oven that isn't purple or pink so it would appeal to her little brother is a fresh sign of movement in an old debate.

Parents who hope to expose their children to different kinds of play - science sets for girls and dolls for boys, for example - can find themselves stymied by a toy industry that can seem stuck in the past when it comes to gender roles.

Hasbro wasn't the only target of criticism this year.

One of the year's hottest toys, the "LEGO Friends Butterfly Beauty Shop," specifically aimed Legos at girls, but turned to tired gender stereotypes with its focus on a beauty shop and inclusion of characters with curves and eyelashes. Barbie turned builder with a new construction set. But while some praised it, others criticized it for being too pink.

Toy experts say the industry reflects cultural norms, and toy companies are giving people what sells. Plenty of parents find nothing wrong with buying pink frou-frou toys for their girls and avoiding stereotypically "girl" toys for their boys in favor of guns and trucks. But other parents are sent into knots by an unapologetically gender-specific toy industry.

"There's a lot of pressure to conform to those gender stereotypes from the time you're pregnant," said Teresa Graham Brett, a higher-education consultant from Tucson, Ariz., and mother to two boys, ages 6 and 11.

Children naturally begin to identify themselves as boys and girls around the ages of 3 and 4, said Dr. Susan Linn, a psychologist at Harvard Medical School, who cofounded the advocacy group Campaign for a Commercial-Free Childhood.

"When a child's environment is filled with rigid messages about, `This is what boys do, this is what girls do,' it limits their ability to reach their full capacity," Linn said. "It's not like girls are born with the predilection to pink, but they're trained to it, so it becomes what they want and need. There are neurological differences between boys and girls at birth. But our goal should be to provide them with a range of experiences so they can develop all of their tendencies."

Large toy stores and most large online retailers often divide toys up by gender. On Amazon, or on the websites for toy makers Mattel or Hasbro, for example, toys are sorted by age, category and gender. A person who wants to buy a baby doll on the Toys R Us website will find hundreds of choices categorized for girls and five for boys. Three of those are dressed in pink.

In recent years, Toys R Us was criticized for an ad selling three microscopes, silver, red and pink. The pink one was the least powerful.

"Toy companies are businesses, so they are responding to and making their products based on consumer demands. They're meeting with moms, focus groups. They're doing what makes sense," said Adrienne Appell, a spokeswoman for the Toy Industry Association.

Chris Byrne, content director for timetoplaymag.com, said the market ultimately decides what makes it onto store shelves and into people's homes.

"The toy industry is always going to reflect the culture at large, and it's going to reflect the market," he said.

That's even true for a soon-to-be-released toy that has gotten a lot of attention for seeking to subvert gender stereotypes. GoldieBlox, a construction toy, was invented by Debbie Sterling, who holds a degree from Stanford in product design engineering and who aimed to make a toy to spark an interest in girls in science and engineering. She was turned off by what she saw in a visit to a toy store.

"I felt like I was in the 1950s," she said. "The girls section was pink. It was teaching a girl how to be a housewife, and a princess and pop star."

Meanwhile, she described the boys section as dynamic, with kits to make interesting things like roller coasters and "smarter more complex, engineering math and science toys."

The toy's main character is Goldie, a female engineer, and it is scheduled to be on store shelves in April. In a concession to commercial realities, the toy's color scheme includes a liberal dose of pink.

"There's a lot of parents out there, they're conditioned by this. They won't even pick up something if it doesn't cue that it's a girl," she said. "I don't want girls to miss out on GoldieBlox because it wasn't overtly messaged for them, at least in the early stages."

Some things are changing in the industry. This year, the London department store Harrods redesigned its toy department to organize it by theme rather than by gender. Swedish toy firm Top-Toy published a gender-neutral catalog in which boys were shown playing with a kitchen set and hair dryer and a girl was shown shooting a toy gun.

Hasbro this week announced it has spent the past 18 months developing an Easy-Bake Oven in the gender-neutral colors of black and silver. It made the announcement after meeting with McKenna Pope, the Garfield, N.J., 13-year-old whose online petition asking the company to make one attractive to all kids gathered tens of thousands of signatures. Hasbro says it knows both boys and girls have fun playing with the Easy-Bake.

Even parents who are sensitive to gender issues say they sometimes have to challenge their own notions. Brett said her older son was interested in toys aimed at both genders as a little boy. But when son number two came along five years later, she was surprised to see he had a stronger preference to play with guns and Army men.

"I really needed to let go of controlling what I thought he should play with as an enlightened boy," she said. "They may choose to do what is stereotypical, and they should have the right to choose that as well."

Source: AP.

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PostPosted: Thu Sep 19, 2013 5:18 am 
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If you think Tom Daley is gay, perhaps it's time to reset the gaydar
by Mark Simpson
Wednesday, 11 September 2013

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Tom Daley shows off his bronze medal at the London Olympics. Photograph: Georgie Gillard/Nopp

Tom Daley isn't gay.

But the Olympic diving bronze medallist and presenter of celebrity Speedo show Splash! – recently voted "World's Sexiest Man" by the readers of gay mag Attitude – doesn't mind if you think he is. Last weekend he told the Sunday Mirror: "I think it's funny when people say I'm gay … I laugh it off. I'm not. But even if I was, I wouldn't be ashamed. It wouldn't bother me in the slightest what people thought."

Quite a few gay pals of mine think they know better. Not because of any special "inside information" gleaned from the gay grapevine, mind, but simply because they "can tell". Because they've seen him on telly they seem to know his sexual orientation better than Daley does himself. Maybe it's because he smiles a lot, takes care over his appearance, is well-mannered and loves his mum. Or maybe it's because he doesn't have a girlfriend at the moment.

But whatever the reason, I suspect many of them might be rather less convinced – or interested in expressing an opinion at all – if Tom didn't look hot in a pair of highly abbreviated swimming trunks.

This kind of gay insistence about Daley's sexuality (and other pretty boys in the public eye, such as the Olympic gymnast and Strictly star Louis Smith) isn't malicious, in fact it's meant affectionately. But unlike Daley, I'm not quite so inclined to laugh it off. In a sense it's the "friendly fire" version of the homophobic tweets Daley has experienced, and the bullying that made him change schools. Unintentionally, it reinforces straight-and-narrow and increasingly obsolete ideas about what boys should and shouldn't be – if they don't conform to that, then they "must" be gay.

Perhaps, for the sake of argument, despite what he actually says Daley "really" is gay, or bisexual. Perhaps he's currently kidding himself, or us – or both. But so what if he is? He's 19. People should be prepared to let Tom be Tom and not project their own past onto his present.

Although gay people – myself included – often pride themselves on their "gaydar", their ability to "spot" another gay person, it's a very imprecise instrument and getting more so all the time. Now that the streets are awash with pretty, moussed, moisturised, gym-toned young men in pastel colours that look like they're auditioning to be in One Direction – and who, like boy band stars don't mind showing physical affection for one another – the poor old gaydar is getting very jammed indeed. Perhaps it's time to turn it off, or at least down a bit. Particularly since iPhone app Grindr is a much more accurate detection system.

In a world where being gay – or looking gay – is no longer such a big deal, a world that gay people worked hard to bring about, perhaps we shouldn't make such a big deal out whether someone "really" is or isn't any more. Like many young men today, Daley clearly loves to be looked at – and he has a way of showering after a dive in front of billions that is, shall we say, very sensual. "I can understand why I have a massive gay following – I spend most of my life half naked in trunks on a diving board showing off my bare chest. I often joke I wear more to bed than I do to work," says Daley.

Being voted the sexiest guy in the world by a gay magazine (Daley's aesthetic straight daddy David Beckham was runner-up) might result in your straight mates gently "taking the mick", but in this age of rampant male tartiness, in which almost every straight male athlete has been on the cover of a gay mag in their knickers, they're probably more than a tad jealous too.

Source: Guardian UK.

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PostPosted: Thu Sep 19, 2013 5:19 am 
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:?

He's not?

:yeahright:

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PostPosted: Sat Jan 25, 2014 11:49 am 
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I guess we need doubt no longer, now that he's come out...
:smile:

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